Health: After the Divorce, Losing Weight Can Help Improve Self Image
Has your divorce left you with the desire to shed more than your ex-partner? You’re not alone. According to a poll commissioned by Wevorce.com, weight loss is the most popular goal for both men and women after a divorce.
But shedding pounds after a separation isn’t easy. Just ask Kim Bibeau, who lost 73 pounds during and after the break-up of her 11-year marriage. Bibeau, who works for the State Legislature in Tallahassee, Fla., originally never imagined that she could become the success story used to encourage others to become healthier. “I had always struggled with my weight,” says Bibeau. “My parents put me on my first diet when I was in seventh grade. It was Atkins — I still have the book.”
Bibeau’s first attempts to lose weight were hampered by the stress of her unhappy relationship. “I was trying to lose weight for all the wrong reasons,” she says. “My husband said that he didn’t want to be married to a fat wife.” However, as the process of her separation began, Bibeau slowly began to realize that she wanted to lose weight not for her then-husband, but for herself. “As soon as I made the change from diet to lifestyle, I started to lose weight,” she says.
Bibeau, now a Weight Watchers group Leader, also enjoyed learning that other people had gone through similar experiences. “When I found out that I wasn’t the only person who had eaten half of a pint of ice cream in one sitting, I felt much better.”
Bibeau’s story is not unique. According to Dr. Gail Altschuler, medical director of the Altschuler Clinic, the process of separating from a partner often prompts the decision to lose weight. “Weight loss is often triggered by a defining moment,” she says. “While ending a marriage is painful, it is also a new beginning. Many people see weight loss as a way to reclaim their health and vitality.”
“Weight put on during the divorce process may also lead to a person’s decision to lose weight after his or her marriage ends. For these people, inability to control food intake during this difficult time can lead to unwanted extra pounds. There is an emotional side to eating. Eating can provide comfort, lessen anxiety, and even soften anger. During a time of emotional turmoil and distress, food can seem like a friend,” says Altschuler.
The stress of a divorce may also play a role. “We know that cortisol, our stress hormone, helps the body to prepare for emergencies by storing up energy,” says Altschuler. “Chronic stress can also add to weight gain by exaggerating this response.”
“Fortunately, unwanted weight can be lost through a return to healthy diet and exercise. The key is to recognize the important role that nutritious eating, regular physical activity, and a positive mindset play in good physical and emotional health, and to get right back on track in practicing these healthy habits,” says Lisa Talamini, vice president of research and program Innovation for
Jenny Craig, Inc.
For Bibeau, this transition began with a new dedication to physical activity. “I exercised,” she says. “I had two small children so making the time to work out was difficult and I couldn’t afford to join a gym. So I walked every day during my lunch hour.”
“This type of workout is ideal for people who lack the time for a more structured workout. It all counts,” says Altschuler. “Start small and increase your activity as you go along. Walking is most common. Don’t be afraid to experiment.You may find that you love a dance class or a bike club. It’s a great time to spend with friends, or sometimes, just to have some quiet time for yourself.”
“Diet also plays a key role in weight loss. Eat lots of lean protein, a small serving every two to three hours to start, lots of vegetables, [and] some fruit and whole grain foods,” say Altschuler. “Skip the white stuff and the packaged products. Refined sugars and starches make you hungry, and if you don’t use all that quick energy right away, you store it as fat.”
Talamini also believes that a healthy relationship with food is a fundamental element of successful weight loss. “One simple change you can make is to begin paying more attention to portion sizes, especially when eating out,” she says. “Use everyday visual cues to create a correctly portioned meal. The protein in your meal, for example, should be approximately three ounces, the size of a deck of cards.”
However, dieters should not completely deprive themselves of their favorite foods. A diet plan that allows for cheating is a good way to satisfy a craving in moderation. “I made sure that every day I was able to eat something that I really loved,” says Bibeau. “I decided to say, ‘You know what? Right now my favorite food is Jelly Beans.’ So I would plan my jelly beans. I would have them once a day.”
Bibeau’s dedication definitely paid off. “Losing weight increased my self-esteem,” she says. “People treat you differently. We treat ourselves differently. I became more outgoing and more able to stand up in a meeting and say what I feel.”
Altschuler agrees that weight loss can help a person move on after a divorce. “Describing one patient who lost about thirty pounds after a divorce”, she says, “The ultimate satisfaction came when she showed up for her son’s wedding. Just seeing the look on her face when she described her ex’s reaction to her new look made all of our work worthwhile.”
DIET PROGRAMS AT A GLANCE
1. Weight Watchers:
Group support mixed with healthy eating. Dieters use a points system to balance track of food intake and exercise while receiving advice and guidance from group Leaders and peers.
Celebrity representative Sarah, Duchess of York. For More Information: visit weightwatchers.com
2. Jenny Craig:
Weekly portion-controlled menus and One-on-One consultations with employees. Celebrity representatives have included Valerie Bertinelli, Kirstie Alley, and Queen Latifah. For more information, visit jennycraig.com.
3. Trimspa:
Weight loss products designed to lessen hunger and burn fat. Before her death, Anna Nicole Smith endorsed this product. For more information. visit trimspa.com.
4. Alli:
Over the counter FDA-approved pills that decrease the amount of fat your body can absorb combined with an online weight loss plan. For more information, visit myalli.com.
5. Nutrisystem:
Portion-controlled menus with plans for women, diabetics, and seniors. Marie Osmond lost 40 pounds as part of her celebrity endorsement. For more information, visit nutrisystem.com.
6. Medifast:
Portion-controlled menus, an online meal planner, and community support. For More Information, visit medifast1.com.
7. South Beach:
Concentrates on carb cravings and includes automated shopping list generator, online meal planner, community support. For more information, visit South Beach DietWeb site.
8. Atkins:
A no-carb diet plan that includes an online carb counter, a diet plan, and an online store. For more information, visit atkins.com.
9. Slimfast:
Your food, our shakes is the company’s marketing campaign. Celebrity endorsement from model Rachel Hunter. For more information, visit slim-fast.com.
FOUR HEALTHY SNACK IDEAS
Don’t reach for that cookie! These treats are perfect to munch on between meals.
Corn Thins by Real Foods with hummus.
“They look like really skinny rice cakes, but two have only forty-five calories,” says Altschuler. To learn more, visit cornthins.com.
100 Calorie Packs.
With Oreos, Chips Ahoy!, and other varieties available in portion controlled packs, you can indulge without guilt. To learn more, visit nabiscoworld.com/100caloriepacks/.
Raw vegetables.
“Instead of visiting the vending machine at work, bring carrots and celery in a plastic bag. This snack is filling and also satisfies the need to munch” says Altschuler.
Dr Praeger’s Spinach Pancakes.
These delicious vegetarian pancakes have only eighty calories each. To learn more, visit www.drpraegers.com.
About the author: Kathryn Kohl is a freelance writer from New York City. She has written for print and online publications about topics ranging from farmers’ markets to fashion.
