Do You Speak Kid?
You’ve heard it maybe seventeen million times. Here’s how the conversation goes in my house and in millions upon millions of other homes with kids (really, no matter what age):
You: Hey there, how was school today?
Your kid: Ok.
You: Oh, so did you learn anything new?
Your kid: No.
You: Remember, no texting or computer until you’ve finished your homework, okay?
Your kid: Whatever.
You: Okay, well what would you like to do later, after you’re done?
Your kid: Nuthin’.
Hmmmmm.
Or maybe your household is more the opposite route:
You: Hey, it’s a beautiful Saturday afternoon, whatcha’ doin’ in your room alone?
Your kid: Nothin’.
You: Don’t you think you should be out enjoying this beautiful weather?
Your kid: Whatever.
You: You want to do something with me?
Your kid: No.
You: Okay, you just want me to close the door and leave you alone with your cellphone and texting?
Your kid: Ok.
One, or both of these conversations ring a bell for you. They must. With the unbelievable popularity of smartphones and texting and home computers and laptops, it’s nearly impossible to avoid these types of conversations and one-word answers with your kids today.
It’s almost as if they all got together and came up with a list of approved kid words that could be communicated to the parental units. The rules are probably convoluted and kid-like: no answers longer than three words unless it has something to do with your allowance or ability to a: be on the computer, b: be on your cell phone or c: go out on the weekend.
The irony is not lost on most parents how kids have absolutely nothing to say, nothing to report, nothing new to announce whatsoever in their seemingly mundane and tedious lives, yet can text away for hours on end to a host of unknowns about who knows what. Odd isn’t it?
So how do we, as parents, get our kids back? When I ask the elders (those who have travelled the parenting road and have come out the other side somewhat unscathed), they tell me that this is no different than their day. That kids today are the same as kids 20, 30, 40 years ago. They all spoke in monosyllables. They all avoided real conversations that lasted more than a minute with the parents. They all had other distractions that kept them engaged.
But something tells me that being able to text your buddies 24/7/365 is a tad more distracting and available and addicting than eagerly anticipating next week’s new movie and the only way to talk about it nonstop was to actually be in front of your friends, you know, eye-to-eye having a conversation that required whole words and sentences. Or maybe you’d be on your one home phone, the one attached to the wall by a long cord. The one that your parents owned and set rules around and besides, they were sitting right there listening to every word, so that’s no fun at all.
When parents of yesterday turned off the lights and said goodnight, that meant all you could really do was either go to sleep or sit up and listen to your albums. Today, while mom and dad slumber, little Jimmy and Tina could easily be in their rooms texting away: sending pictures, sharing information and news and ‘liking’ statuses on Facebook until the wee hours of the morning. And trust me, what they’re sharing at 3AM is a tad more than Ok, No, Whatever and Nothin’.”
