If You’ve Disconnected, How To Connect Again
Q: My wife and I are good solid people within our respective lives. However, somehow we seem to make each other miserable. Things are so tender between us now with both of us walking on eggshells that we may not make it.
It’s so odd that two people can love each other and yet sometimes, neither of us feels loved by the other one. The disconnect between what you think you’re giving out and what each of you feels he or she is receiving is a common one in marriage.
Imagine someone lovingly making you bacon and eggs for breakfast every morning, thinking they’re showing you love when the reality is you don’t like big breakfasts and are more the cereal-and-fruit type. Helping someone to feel loved must line up with the way in which they want/need to be loved. For some people, it’s words of affirmation that warm their hearts. For others, it’s acts of service or still others touch and affection. These have been described as types of “love languages.”
I suggest you read the “Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman for more on the subject of creating compatible love languages in marriage.
